Sex, love & intimacy

Love addict and love avoidant

Sex and love addiction, often sensationalised in the press and very misunderstood, is in its simplest form an avoidance of intimacy, which is how we successfully work with it here at CHARTER. Whether you are prone to compulsively falling in and out of love, to conflicted relationships where there is violence or infidelity, to being clingy and needy (or the reverse), or to having no awareness of any need for sex or love, everyone who suffers from this condition is hiding from intimacy. As a result a relationship with anyone – even a therapist – can feel like a threat.

The slow process of getting to know somebody and building a relationship, with all of its uncertainty and potential to feel vulnerable generates profound fear in a sex or love addict that is usually connected, consciously or otherwise, to childhood experience. The person may not experience it as fear though, instinctively altering it so that it becomes sexualised or dramatised, or turns it to obsession or invites rejection. Whether that is in individual therapy, a group or a workshop, we talk about these kinds of relationship patterns a lot at CHARTER.

People who suffer from Love Addiction struggle with their relationships in extremes of all or nothing – of being commitment shy to being desperately and painfully ‘in love’, so much so that your friends are fed up hearing you on the subject of your ‘love’. Its isolating and leaves people in despair. The sex addict is no different, as they tend to suffer in silence due to shame.

At CHARTER helping people to develop healthy relationships is a particular strength. We can help you to work through these relational difficulties to gain better insight and understanding of your behaviours, to be able to take responsibility for what you feel you need and want and to be accountable for your actions in a healthy way. Readmore +

Families & Partners

If you are someone in relationship with someone who suffers from sex and love addiction, you are likely to be deeply affected as this addiction operates in relationship. People close to this addict can experience feelings of hurt and confusion, as well as shame, disgust and anger, and the feelings are difficult to process as there is so much stigma about sex in our society. Sometimes these symptoms present as PTSD. At CHARTER we can provide you with the specific help you need to recover, depending on the format of your relationship with the sex addict, whether you are a partner, a child, a sibling or a parent. If you are close to a love addict, you may find that your own behaviour has become aggressive and punishing and you feel you are losing yourself and cannot understand why.

At CHARTER we can support you to explore these feelings so that you can once again find peace in yourself. We will properly assess your individual needs so that we can offer you the specific support you need, but in the meantime we suggest you attend our popular Family Group on Tuesday evenings, a valued resource for many family members, providing education and support, and where many families and partners begin their own recovery journey.

Getting help

We are always happy to answer any questions you may have. You can make an appointment with our assessment team using our Enquiry Form below or simply give us a call so that we can discuss your treatment options and how we can help you or a member of your family.

You might find the information in our PDF library useful. You can download more detailed information about sex, love, intimacy and other related issues.

PDF LIBRARY

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Enquairy Section

Enquiries

If you think you or somebody you know needs some help you can either give us a call or complete our enquiry form and one of our team will get back to you within 24 hours.

Looking for something particular? Try our sitemap or try our very useful PDF library and download some info to keep.

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For those of you seeking help please confirm your funding options
(approximate minimum £1,000)


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